akakuro_sama

It's starting as a 20-song meme and gradually growing into a 100-song one. XD

( Ganked from kazeraikaku )

I fucking hate hamsters. If you thought humans had a monopoly on doing unspeakably nasty things to their own species, you have clearly never kept multiple hamsters.

( Cut for the sake of those with vivid imaginations. )

Working at a pet store is such a joy.

In DW5XL (at least, in Destiny mode), Zhuge Liang is actually criminally incompetent. In sharp contrast to every other officer I've served under (Sima Yi, actually, was especially good at saving my ass), if you're getting gang-raped by a thousand enemy officers, he won't pull them off you, even if he's standing like two feet away; I died once and almost died twice because of this. In one battle, we were supposed to be defending this one guy, Sun Qian; Liang was off masturbating, nowhere near him, and Qian almost died - the only reason he didn't is because I made myself his meatshield. Any wonder I defected to Cao Cao the moment I had the chance?
The moral of the story: always serve under Sima Yi. He'll protect you, he'll teach you how to set things on fire after your second battle, and, truth be known, he loves you: he'll set you up beautifully not just to survive, but to flourish, and then when you can take on the world and pen cheerful marching tunes in its blood, he'll send you off on his devious (and fun) little errands. Besides, you can always let someone else hire you away later.


( And a meme, just for the hell of it. )

You know what's even more natural than breastfeeding?

Pissing.

Yet there are laws against doing it in public, even supposing you were to dispose of your waste properly.
Why can't breastfeeding in public be similarly banned?

Forewarning: If any aspects of this entry make little to no sense at present, or are poorly-ordered, it's because I've been drinking. I'll edit it when I can bother with being sober.

( I've come to the conclusion that I fucking hate DW5. )

Further additions and edits pending.

Just picked up Dynasty Warriors 5 last night. There have definitely been changes - some of them good, some of them tragic. In the latter category, we have Sima Yi's new VA. With the old one, he had a sexy evil voice (yes, I am a fangirl. We all have our cross to bear.) The new one, however, sounds like he's been sucking helium. Less tragic, but still sad, is that Ts'ao Pi is portrayed as a fairly decent person. He's supposed to have been every bit as Machiavellian as his father, only less put-together (though Ts'ao Ts'ao did get kind of paranoid towards the end). In the game, he also seems to have a bit of a father fixation, which I find amusing in a mildly disturbing way.

Also, there is tension between Sima Yi and Ts'ao Pi that should not be. In the novel, Ts'ao Pi totally fanboys Sima Yi - shortly after he takes the throne, for example, there's this one scene wherein Sima Yi is proposing a battle plan, and Ts'ao Pi is hanging on to his every word.

Speaking again of Sima Yi, in DW5 he's arrogant even for who he is. From what I've gathered, Ts'ao Ts'ao was probably the first man he ever had respect and admired (Zhuge Liang being the second and last). In DW5, however, he respects no one, and he's actively planning to take over Wei. Uh, no. He was content to serve, so long as he was properly appreciated and his masters didn't act like complete and total dumbfucks. If anyone out there has read the novel, the only reason why he turned on the Ts'ao family and pulled off a coup d'etat is because one of them usurped his military power and wouldn't rectify this mistake, even after Sima Yi spent about two months telling him, (wording not exact) "All right, son, just give it back, and ain't no one gonna get hurt. You don't want the shit to start flyin' around here, now, do ya?"

Zhang He now sounds gay AND stoned, and he uses the word "beautiful" like he's getting royalties on it. Argh, so painful. The above is, of course, without even going into detail about his costume, wherein the gay makes you want to take a sharpened steel spork to Koei. Also, after you beat his legend mode, the final cutscene is him leading his troops in a dance. OMGWTFBBQ BRAIN ERROR CRITICAL FAILURE SYSTEM SHUTDOWN IN 10... 9...
Also, Zhang He is definitely with Xiahou Yuan. Play through Yuan's musou mode, and you'll see it - especially if you defeat Zhang He yourself at the battle against Yuan Shao (I forgot the name of the battle, damn me).

The history is still screwy (it's gotten better, though! Yay!), and things like character depth could still be better in general. I suppose that's why I'll be writing fanfiction, arrogant as that makes me sound... but then, I never made any pretense of modesty.